Kiss Your Kids, Look Twice and Wear Clean Knickers

At the age of 21 I got hit by a car... and I mean absolutely splattered. It was at the beginning of my 4th year at Uni and my parents had called me to tell me that my Grandmother had passed away. Whilst it was very sad, in all honesty we hadn't been close combined with the fact she had suffered dementia for many years so had been "away with the fairies" for as long as I could remember. But of course, I loved my Grandmother and was told her funeral would be at the end of the week. Now - truth be told - the timing sucked! Us 4th years had returned a week early to kick off our major projects - a culmination of our time with our noses in books. The week was full of project meetings, design workshops and I remember anguishing over how on earth I was going to take time off on the Friday to make the funeral. 

It was at that point I stepped out in front of a Volvo. Oh no, not a little Corsa or something I stood at least a fighting chance with but instead a big, old, solid Volvo with no crumple zones except me. It was the whole deal, road sealed off, 1st Emergency Responders, 2 ambulance crews the lot . In front of a crowd of my peers and general gawpers I had my clothes and shoes cut off me, was strapped to neck boards, back boards and leg boards, had my face bound in surgical gauze before being blue lighted off to Southampton General. 

Luckily nothing was broken although my face didn't come off quite so lightly (ok ok folks hold the jokes please!!) I remember very clearly 2 hours of extremely painful facial surgery as they basically stitched my nose and mouth back onto my head and back together. Needless to say I made it to my Grandmother's funeral, although on the day as my mother so kindly pointed out, I looked as if I could have crawled in next to her. 

One of my favourite "songs" is Baz Luhrmann's "Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen)". It is based on a famous graduation speech and in it he gives advice to his peers on how to get through life. One of the best lyrics in the song is "The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind. The kind that blindsides you at 4 PM on some idle Tuesday." Many people's lives were blindsided that Tuesday... mine (and my nose obviously) but the poor, completely blameless woman who hit me was absolutely traumatised, my parents who received a call saying "your daughter has been hit by a car and suffered severe head trauma - that's all we know"  and even that poor Japanese bloke on the side of the road that had to watch my jeans being cut off me....

Today I've learnt many things from this experience... I never leave my kids without kissing them and saying I love them, I always look twice before crossing the road but, most importantly, when I'm stressed to hell over time and getting everything done, I try and see what exactly is truly important versus all those other things that just seem really urgent. 

So today at 2.30 when an impromptu urgent meeting was called I realised I wouldn't get to pick up my kids and take them to their first ballet show when all 4 were in it together. However in 10 years time no one would remember that meeting I couldn't go to but my kids would remember Mummy let them down at the last minute on their ballet show. And the crazy thing was, the moment I mentioned this to the meeting organiser, it was absolutely no problem to reschedule the meeting to Monday. in fact I was the only one that had attributed such levels of urgency to it not those I had originally perceived. 

So whilst I don't recommend throwing yourself under a Volvo to have life changing moment, perhaps sometimes we could step back and just see if we have our priorities in balance...family, relationships, career and to sense check that with our limited time we understand those things on our To Do list that are truly important versus those that just seems important at the time. And if that fails... kiss your kids often, look twice when crossing the road and don't forget to wear clean underwear.